THE VICTIM'S STORY

Exposure tells the tragic true story of one of Haringey's many young victims of bulllying

Bullying can be a very painful and emotional experience for the victim.  Below I have  interviewed  a boy who has experienced the trauma of being bullied for the last three years.   We cannot mention his real name due to the seriousness of the matter but for the purposes of our article we will call him James.  We would just like to say thank you to the boy for giving us this interview and allowing Exposure readers to share his experiences. We know it must have been very hard for him to talk to us but hopefully something positive may come out of it.
When did the bullying start?-It started when I first came to secondary school .
When was this?-September 1992
When you got bullied what kind of bullying was it?-It was nasty name-calling at first: ''Gingerbread Man", "Freckle Face" and many others.
Was there any physical abuse involved?-Oh yes, but that was later.
Who bullied you?-It's a group of strong tall boys. I remember one incident when they pushed
me onto the floor in the gym and took my trainers, but they gave them back.
Have you told anyone?-Tell? I can't tell.
Why not?-If I tell they will bully me even more. You don't know what it's like being bullied. You get all this advice on what to do. Some say tell a teacher, others say it will only make it worse.
What kind of name calling hurt you the most?-It was when they 'cussed' my mother. They said things like my mother must have done an awful sin to have me. They said things like:
 "Hey Gingerbread Man, I saw your mother in Sainsbury's yesterday. She's got cellulate growing on her face."
I know how you must have felt. That is such a nasty thing to say.
How has this bullying affected your life at home?-I argue a lot with my parents. They don't know what's happening to me.  Sometimes at night when I go to bed I start crying. The best part of the
year is the summer holidays. That's the only time when they can't get me. I have around two or three bruises given to me every day.
People do get through this  situation.You must  get some help. No! After James refused to do anything to help his situation I felt unable to carry on.  I felt really sad that he felt so scared. It is such a Catch 22 situation. 

The Exposure reporter who submitted this article wishes to remain anonymous in order to protect 'James'.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU'RE A VICTIM

Be assertive - practice saying ''NO'' in the mirror.
Walk tall - if you don't look like a victim you wont be treated as such.
TELL YOUR FRIENDS - It's harder to bully a group than just one person.
STAY IN A GROUP - There's safety in numbers, even if they're not your friends
GET HELP - You should never be ashamed to ask for help. Speak to your
parents, a teacher or your youth worker.
And finally, never give up the hope of being free from the bully boys!
YOU'RE NOT ALONE

If you are the victim of bullying it may be comforting to know that many famous movie stars were once on the receiving end themselves Mission Impossible tough guy Tom Cruise was bullied very badly when he was younger. His parents moved around a lot and he was always the new kid in school. His advice is "always stick up for yourself!"
Singer Whitney Houston used to get teased a lot because of her skin colour. "I finally accepted that I was on my own. It's not a crime not to have friends," she said.
Mel Gibson who spent his early years in Australia used to get bullied because of his American accent. Michelle Pfeiffer's nickname was Mud Turtle.  "The only way to fight it is to gain respect," she advises. "I became a tomboy and beat up the boys!"

Useful telephone numbers:  
Anti Bullying Campaign 0171-378 1446, 
Kidscape 0171-730 3300,
Childline 0800 1111 & 
Youth Access 01162 558763 (for details of your local counselling and advice centre)

EXPOSURE YOUTH MAGAZINE
PUBLISHED BY HARINGEY YOUTH PUBLISHING PROJECT
WWW address: http://www.youth-service.demon.co.uk/exposure/